Happy (Late) Gap Day: Our Second Year

Another Gap Day, come and gone.  Looking back over our blog for the last year, it's been woefully neglected.  Our adventures have been few and far between.  But boy, have we been busy living life.

One big development was in Ben's job at CSIRO.  In March, he switched positions and labs, making the official change from postdoctoral researcher to full-blown research scientist.  He's now working on Cochlear implants, which is proving to be challenging but interesting work.  The biggest change, however, is this new job extended our stay here - instead of going back to the US in November of 2013, we're here until March of 2015, a change that we are all very happy with.  Ben is also still in the Young Men's program at church, where they've been very gracious in letting him be late to or miss a lot of those Tuesday night activities so he can stay home and help Steph with bedtime.  He still rides his bike to work every day and unfortunately, his number of flat tires has multiplied exponentially and then some over the last year.  Something about riding past a metal-recycling yard does him in more often than not.

Steph has spent the entire last year either pregnant with or taking care of the twins.  There's not much else to say there.  Exercise has all but stopped - though she did manage to ride her bike up to the bitter end, even pulling Hank to school in the trailer in the cold rain on the day the twins were born.  She is also officially the organist at church now, though hasn't played since her belly got too big to fit behind the organ.  And now that the babies are here, she spends more time in the nursing mothers' room at church than anywhere else, so her organ-playing continues to lie dormant.  She volunteered as much as possible in the boys' classrooms and at Auskick right up until she could barely walk from being so pregnant, but again, hasn't done much in that way in the last five months.  She also played in the Melbourne Regional Orchestra until March (when she could no longer sit in one position comfortably for more than ten minutes at a time) and hopes to be back to playing the violin more by Christmas.  We'll talk more about that common thread that has turned Steph's life upside down more than anyone else's in a bit, but suffice it to say, she's ready to get back to her old shenanigans.  Or at least to have a day off.  Or even a good six hours of unbroken sleep.  Any of that will do.

Now on to Abe (8).  There's a part in "Sleepless in Seattle" when after his son sasses his girlfriend, Tom Hanks apologizes with , "He's 8." and she responds, "He's good at it."  Well, that describes Abe pretty perfectly.  He gets sassier every day, proving that he is the fulfillment of Steph's mom's curse that she get a child JUST LIKE HER.  He also gets more Aussie every day.  His accent is changing; we reckon he'll come back to the US sounding like he doesn't belong anywhere in particular.  Still obsessed with footy, he excelled at Auskick this year, missing only one practice when we were out of town.  He's also doing well at school, still being challenged by his teacher and performing well.  Last week, he was Space Mouse #4 in the grade two production; he seemed to be more excited about the prospect of wearing face paint than anything.  Abe's biggest accomplishment this year was turning 8.  Steph's parents will be coming out later this week for a visit, during which Abe will be baptized.  He can't wait.

Hank (4) has had an amazing year.  He finished up 3yo kinder back in December and continued behavioral therapy through the summer.  In February, he started 4yo kinder two days/week, all day.  He has an aide, and the kinder continues to work as hard now as they ever did to include Hank and work with his abilities as well as his challenges.  In March, his teacher recommended we check out a school for autism just a couple kilometres down the road.  It's typically quite hard to get into due to stringent class-size limitations, but as it turned out, they had a spot free on the three days Hank isn't at kinder, so he started there less than a week after it was recommended to us.  With alternating being in a neurotypical kindergarten with lots of kids and a very small class where Hank is the highest-functioning of all the kids, he has really run the gamut of social and academic interactions this year, and it shows.  He is nearly unrecognizable as the boy from a year ago.  Not that he's cured or anything - that will never happen as his brain is simply wired differently from the average human's - but we are all getting better at managing his autism better, learning how to push him and stretch him to reach his potential.  And his potential is high.  When he starts Prep in February, he will be reading at a first-grade level.  It's the kind of thing that has given us and him a reality check as to what he is capable of accomplishing.  Hank is also showing strong signs of having inherited the Fairbanks artistic streak - he will draw, paint, and color for hours.  One of his favorite things is to take sidewalk chalk and mush it into puddles on the driveway, making a sort of colored paste which he then uses to "paint" on any and everything he can get to outside.  So if you see pink hand prints on the side of our car, you know where they came from.

And now for our newest family members - twins Hazel and Silas (5 months).  These two joined our family back in May, effectively turning our lives upside down in every way possible.  They are very good babies generally, loving attention from anyone who will give it to them, but especially from their big brothers.  Steph has never been much of a baby person, much preferring the 18mos+ age, yet getting used to having two babies at once has been less of a nightmare than she anticipated.  Sure, everything takes twice as long and sleep is twice as absent, but there is something so amazing and special about having two of them that makes it a bit easier to bear.  Plus, they're so dang cute.  Hazel is such a girl - she squeals and screeches and makes noises that we've never heard come out of our boys.  Sy is a jolly one, nearly always smiling and has just as much to say about life as his babbling sister, albeit somewhat quieter and lower-pitched.  They do typical baby stuff, so nothing exciting there, but it sure is amazing to set them on the floor next to each other and watch them interact.  They are very lucky to have each other, and we are so very blessed to have them.

So there you have it.  Two years down, two and a half more to go.  Wonder what adventures this country has in store for us next..?

October 2012

Hazel and Silas at 5 Months: What We've Learned So Far

Hazey Dazey & Smilas

Five months today.  Hard to believe.  In some ways, this has been the longest five months of our lives.  Yet somehow, it seems to have flown by.

We've learned a lot.  We look back on those first three months especially and say to ourselves, "How..what...huh..?"  You couldn't pay us enough to relive it.  Thankfully, things have improved.  A lot.  So what have we learned?

• Two babies, grown in the same uterus at the same time, are still two different people with different likes, needs, and wants.
• Just because a baby might sleep through the night at 3 months does not mean they won't revert to newborn sleeping habits a month later.  Thankfully, they might go back to sleeping through the night by five months (at least one, anyway - see first point).
• Just because they grew in the same uterus blah, blah, blah does not mean proximity helps them sleep better.  Be prepared to have one in another area of the house pretty much always during any sleeping time, including your own room.
• There will only be about two hours from 7am-7pm where both babies are asleep at the same time.  So good luck being productive or catching up on sleep yourself.
• Obsessing about the sleep habits of two infants in the same home on a constant basis may lead to a dependency on Mint Slice biscuits.  Or any other kind of chocolate, really.
• Lack of sleep and therefore, exercise + chocolate biscuits = so much for fitting into pre-pregnancy clothes anymore.
• Twins actually do smile and have even been found to be happy for short bursts at the same time on occasion.
• Twins are actually a lot of fun.  Especially when the above is happening.
• Being the parent of twin babies gives you a very good reason to say "no".  Unfortunately, that means even when you really want to say "yes".
• You come to realize how much you are loved and appreciated by your friends and neighbors.  (Or maybe they just feel sorry for us..?)
• You'll be able to go out and have adventures again someday.  Just not yet.
• Now that the twins aren't covered up and asleep during errand-running time anymore, the stares/stops/questions are much more common.  And you will be sniffed out by any twin parent in a 200-metre radius who will come over with much helpful advice/commiseration to share (which we really do appreciate).

On that last point, we learned the coolest thing today from a lovely Nigerian man.  Also a parent of twins, he told us that in his country, the baby born first (in our case, Hazel) is actually considered to be the younger sibling as the elder (Silas) unselfishly makes way for the younger to come out first.  How beautiful is that?

Australianizing Footy

If there’s one thing that Australians love it is unsolicited advice from Americans about their national sport.  So, with this in mind, I here present a few suggestions on the Australianizing of Australian Rules Football or “footy.”  For those who don’t know, footy is a terribly entertaining sport sharing aspects of rugby, soccer, volleyball, American football and even basketball.  It is a sport like no other and is a true Aussie invention.  Footy team mascots, on the other hand, are generally pretty generic.  Lions and tigers and eagles!  Oh my!  These could be the mascots of NFL teams from Detroit, Cincinnati or Philidelphia.  “But the footy club of the Richmond Tigers have been around since before the Cincinnati Bengals” someone might argue, and they would be right.  But with a whole continent full of remarkable, powerful and lethal potential mascots why adopt a mascot from Asia to represent a team of a sport that is so exclusively Australian?  So, I have decided that some footy teams should alter or replace their mascots. 

Old Name:New Name

Carlton Blues:Carlton Blue Rings:  There is no more boring mascot than a color.  It’s true of the Cleveland Browns and it’s true of the Carlton Blues. Blue is only a shade more intimidating than pink (by the way, Melbourne Football Club was originally the Fuschias). “But the name carries so much history” they say.  It does carry history, but not really that much.  All the name tells us is the color shirts that the players originally wore.  We’re footy fans, for the love.  We don’t care about clothing; we care about metaphorically killing the other team.  And what could be more Australian than a lethally poisonous octopus?

Melbourne Demons:Tasmanian Devils: Of 18 professional footy teams, fully half are within a 40 minute drive from downtown Melbourne.  To make the league more representative of Australia as a whole, some teams may be relocated.  This is how the South Melbourne Swans became the Sydney Swans.  While the Demons are my team and I’d hate to see them leave, I think that for the sake of the sport they should be moved to Tasmania and their mascot should be changed from demons to devils, thus becoming the Tasmanian Devils.

Richmond Tigers:Richmond Tiger Snakes:  Of the ten most venomous snakes in the world, ten call Australia home.  Number 4 on that list, with distinctive tan and brown bands is the tiger snake.  While it might be uncommon to find a tiger snake in Richmond (I’m sure it’s more likely than finding a tiger) they are abundant in nearby rural areas.

Sydney Swans:Sydney Black Swans:  Sydney can keep their mascot, but they should change the color.  White swans are native to the Northern Hemisphere, while the native Australian swans are black.  This would be a very minor change to the team logo, yet would celebrate Australian fauna. 

Brisbane Lions:Brisbane Drop Bears: Brisbane’s professional footy team was previously the Brisbane Bears, with a koala (bear) mascot.  When Fitzroy was merged with Brisbane the team was renamed the Lions.  I don’t know why this is.  Perhaps it’s because koalas hardly provoke thoughts of athletic prowess.  Perhaps the powers that be decided that they could not continue misleading the public with the implicit suggestion that koalas are bears.  So, what is a “drop bear” you ask.  I would look it up on Wikipedia, if I were you, but I’ll give you the cliff’s notes version here.  A “drop bear” is like a koala on steroids with a taste for blood.  It is a carnivorous koala-like mammal that jumps or drops on its unsuspecting prey from the branches above.  They are entirely fictional and often, in jest, Australians will warn gullible tourists that when they go bushwalking they must smear vegemite behind their ears to ward off any potential attacks. 

West Coast Eagles:West Coast Wedge Tails:  Wedge tailed eagles or “wedgies” are the largest bird of prey in Australia.  Have you ever seen “The Rescuers Down Under?” There’s an eagle in that movie.  I don’t remember if it was a wedge tail or not, but it should have been.
Greater Western Sydney Giants:Greater Western Sydney Giant Worms OR Greater Western Sydney Great Whites: The Giants.  New York, San Francisco and now Sydney.  Giants are among  the most unoriginal mascots.  But Giant Worms?  Now that's original.  And Australian.  Australia is home to the world's largest earth worm.  Some may think that worms are a lowly, meek and nonthreatening mascot.  Anyone who has no fear of worms has never hosted an intestinal parasite or has never read the novel "Dune."  But, if the Greater Western Sydney Giant...Worms doesn't do it for you, I have an Australian alternative.  The Greater Western Sydney Great Whites.  Australia leads the world in attacks per capita by Great White Sharks.  Or it might.  I don't actually know, but it sounds reasonable.  There are quite a few every year. 

Canberra Convicts: The capital city of Australia has no footy team.  This should be rectified.  And what better mascot than the convict, paying homage to the history of Australia as an English penal colony.